The Time I Wanted to Disown My Kids

(Simmer down CPS.  I’m totally kidding.  Kinda.)

I’ve been coveting a photo session with the ridiculously talented Drew B ever since I first saw this photo shoot she did for Julie.  (Although this one is hands down my favorite.)

When I finally took the plunge and booked my mini session, full attention went into wardrobe styling.

Lucky for me, Julie already has three girls with crazy cute clothes…and even luckier, she had two dresses that were not only perfect for the shoot, but just the right size!  I love my friends.  They always come in handy.

The day of the shoot I was a total drill seargeant about naps and feeding.

“TAKE A NAP!  Today is NOT the day you can skip!”

“Make sure you eat your whole lunch!”

I tried to make it sound like it was akin to going to Disneyland.

“We’re taking pictures today!!!  YAY!!!  It’s going to be so. much. fun!  Aren’t you excited???!!!”

On the way, my palms were sweating and butterflies had taken up residence in my tummy.

Cousin Tess and Auntie Marcia came along.

“I feel like I’m going on a first date.  STRESS!”

“Why?”

“Because this is kind of a one shot deal.  If they decide to scream and cry or something, the pictures will look awful.  I really want these pictures to be phenomenal.”

You know where this is going, right?

Lucy decided that today would be the day that she would. not. smile.

Of all three of my kids, Lu is the one with the biggest, heartiest laugh.

That day?  Miss Serious was in da house.

She wasn’t crying or fussing.

Just acting like she was presiding over a Congressional Hearing.

And her pretty new headband wouldn’t stay on.  It kept sliding down onto her face and looked like those weird glasses that dude in Star Trek wears.  So it finally came off…her hair a curly untamed halo on her head.

Totally the look I was going for.

Jill was in a bit of a serious mood too.

My sweet natured blonde just kinda looked at Drew.  And apparently her legs were made of rubber that day because they buckled right underneath her.

Girl had no intention of performing.

“I don’t get out of bed for less than $10,000 a day lady.  I ain’t smiling OR standing for you.”

Henry was pretty good.  He’s a little older, so he was a little more flexible.  But even still, he wasn’t exactly angelic.  Although relative to his sisters, he was a candidate for Favorite Child of the Day.  No doubt.

I was a stress case.  I walked away and directed Tess and Marcia in charge.  “Please try to get them to smile.  I’m going to die.”

And I walked away.

I couldn’t hack it.

At one point, Drew, who is known for being particularly good at getting those natural smiles from kids…Drew, who I’ve heard from multiple different people: “…and she’s just SO GOOD with the kids!“…that same Drew came to me about halfway through, camera in hand, exhausted, and sighing…”Jeannett, I’ve tried everything.  I really don’t know what else to do.  I cannot get them to smile.”

Awesome.  Way to go kids.  You just managed to be the most uncooperative clients she has had.  Cool.

Because that’s not mortifiying  or anything.

Drew emailed me the gallery a couple of weeks later.  I didn’t even open it until the next morning.  I couldn’t bear to see.

My stomach was in knots.

Dang kids.

 

At first I was super annoyed at Lucy.

Seriously kid.  How ridiculously perfect would this picture be if she was looking up?!

She was OBSESSED with the presents and wanted to open them.  We tried over and over to convince her that they were nothing more than empty boxes.

Apparently we’re liars.  Those boxes held something fancy.  She could feel it in her bones.

 

But slowly, as I clicked through the gallery, my furrowed brow softened and I felt a smile creeping.

This photo.  Makes my heart want to burst.

This is Lucy and Henry.  Best friends.  This is their relationship.

He got her to smile for us.  By tickling her.

A serious case of big brother worship goes on in our house.

 

The big red bow.

The hand holding.

Okay, maybe Drew needs to change her business cards to say “Magician” instead.

Sisters sharing gummy bears.

So gentle.  So patient.  Waiting until Jill’s little fingers have a good grip and won’t drop it.

The bigger two are extraordinarily patient and gentle with the little one.

I love that we got this shot.

Because these photos managed to capture relationships.

Personalities.

The dynamic in our house.

And then this one.

The one that begs to be a giant stretched canvas over the mantle.

The one that makes my mama’s heart melt into a puddle in my chest.

Is it perfect?

Nope.  Perfection would be LuLu leaning in and you know, smiling like the other two.

But the more I thought about it, I realized this picture IS perfect.

This is our family.

Our imperfect family.

Our family where nothing really goes exactly as planned.

The photoshoot from hell that tells the story of our lives.

I realized that these pictures are so much more poignant than if everyone was in model form.

Because the stories we tell years from now will make us laugh.

Like the time mom agonized over the perfect photoshoot and none of y’all cooperated and made her want to crawl into a hole and die.

And how mom is going to deduct the cost of this photo shoot from your college accounts.

And hang it over your little heads for the rest. of. your. God. given. lives.

That’s what our life is like.  That’s what makes our life fun.  That’s what makes our family…our family.

Thank you Drew for capturing my crazy little brood.

I’m sorry if you aged 10 years.

I understand if we’ve been blacklisted.

 

 

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jeannett
I'm a mom to four. A wife to one. I believe in story. I love telling you about mine and would love to hear yours. There's really no sense in wasting our suffering and not sharing in each other's joy. We're all in this together...even if it doesn't always feel like it.
jeannett
jeannett

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Comments

  1. 1

    Although I can TOTALLY empathize with the pre-shot stress fest, the photos are perfect and your children simply lovely — and just think you got an great story to retell at holidays..soiunds like a win/win to me –Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

  2. 2

    Not to make light of your pre-photo everything has got to be perfect jitters…but these are PRECIOUS! Seriously. Isn’t that what photography is supposed to be about? A moment…captured in time. These kiddos had a moment and you now have it forever. ;-)

  3. 3

    oh yes. OH YES. I have been there. But you got some gorgeous shots that tell a true story. They really capture a moment in time, and that is what you’ll look back on and be so glad that you have :)

  4. 4

    You are a wOman after my heart!! This is every photo session we have ever done! At the little picture studio we’ve been going since my oldest turned 1, they know just to start snapping. If they get smiles great if not, well I make it work! Those pictures you got are fabulous and beautiful and are better than manufactured smiles hands down. But I think the cost should definitely be deducted from the college fund. Ha ha!
    Happy Monday,
    Megan

  5. 5
    rachel slagle says:

    been there! we did a family photo shoot a few months back and dillon would. not. cooperate. not only did he not want to smile but the stinking kid was making faces and running away. ugh!

    your pictures turned out beautiful!

  6. 6

    Thank you for this. I had the exact same experience with my monkeys last week. I’ve been dying to get a session done with an amazing local photographer. Finally booked a mini session with Santa. I pictured amazing shots with sparkle in their eyes as Santa walked into the room. Instead I got stone cold poker faces. Nothing. Brutal. There was about 5 passable shots from the shoot so my Christmas card is still saved but I am so disappointed. I’ll laugh at the bloopers one day. But today is not that day. :)

  7. 7

    I have a feeling that if we lived closer we would be friends. Best friends even. Cause I swear this is so me and those are so my kids. Not just with photoshoots, but with anything important (and by important, I mean important to me.) Now my husband tells me before anything comes up to stay calm and just go with the flow. He’s much more laid back than me. And I’m all, “Well, how is everything going to be perfect is such and such doesn’t happen?” Of course later I realize I could have chilled out some. I’m trying to learn to let go, but it’s hard to not want to micromanage everything.
    Back to the main point, the photo are gorgeous. They really did turn out beautifully. I love the last one of all 3 of them. And I love the look on Lucy’s face. She’s all, “I’ve got this.” lol

  8. 8

    those are perfect pictures. … My 3 kids are in their 20’s and I have a photo collage of the same thing … and to this day that is some of my most treasured photos of all my kids together at ages 2, 4, and 7. You are gonna love those photos for ever!!!

  9. 9

    I just clicked over, taking a break from working on our Christmas cards . . . over-analyzing the photos from our recent family photo shoot, trying to find the “perfect” one. And so I had to laugh, because this was just what the photo shoot day was like at our house! And yet, you are right – it is about capturing the relationships, the moments, the imperfection. Thanks for the breath of fresh air!

  10. 10

    Your family shots brought tears to my eyes. As I was reading, I felt exactly like you on more than one occasion. Then to see the love between them was so touching. You are blessed!

  11. 11

    Ok… WOW! Cutest kids ever! So great!

  12. 12

    1. photos that are not all “everyone say cheeeeese” are my favorite. they are real. they capture relationship and life. that is what you want.
    2. i made that dressI (the aqua one) and your daughter rocked it!
    3. julie is rad and so is drew.
    4. i don’t know ANYONE who doesn’t stress at photoshoots.
    5. i sat next to you at blog sugar, remember me? with the BRIGHT yellow shirt?

    love this post.

  13. 13

    I’m going to have to re-read this in about a week when we have our family shots scheduled. It really does take a patient photographer, someone willing to just keep shooting, to capture those moments. I am preparing myself to not enjoy the shoot in all honestly, but maybe I just need to let them do their thing and we’ll be okay after all. Oh the stress……. I just want one good shot!

  14. 14

    Despite the stress you all had…. The photo’s are beautifull! Love the polkadot dress!

  15. 15

    these are incredible! so amazing. i know you’ll treasure these even more from the pre-photo stage & then the end result. which is super super awesome!

  16. 16

    My 3 year old hates getting pictures taken. Last year we avoided it all together…there are no 2 year pictures of him. But this year we have a new baby and I wanted a family picture so badly. He sat off to the side crying on the ground the whole time. I was really disappointed, but when I got the gallery I was surprised there were like 2 pictures where he was ACTUALLY SMILING…and one family shot that is even frame worthy!

    Your photos and kids are just gorgeous. I used to think the shots of perfect smiling kids were the only way but now I kind of like the ones where their true personalities show. Who am I trying to kid anyway?? haha

  17. 17

    so, i have to tell you that if you had just posted the pics without the back story i would have never been the wiser. they are magical…all on their own. these pics are AMAZING! but knowing bits of their personalities makes them even better.

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