Brenda got my blood work back. She called me in to see her this morning (yes, on a Saturday). Apparently, my hemoglobin levels (I think that was the one) are low, my blood pressure is still up and my swelling is about the same. And, when I got there, turns out I had trace amounts of protein in my urine as well. Three out of five pre-eclampsia symptoms. So, I’m going to go see Dr. Safarik (on Tuesday or Wednesday) who wants me to have my blood run again on Monday to see if anything is changing rapidly. When I asked Brenda if I officially had pre-e, she said that that was why she wanted me to see Dr. Safarik…she wanted him to look everything over and make the official determination, but yes, it looked like it.
What does it mean? Well, depending on how severe the Dr. thinks it is, I may have to be induced quite soon. I am at 36 weeks…so, if I have to be induced before 38 weeks, I have to have a hospital birth. If I can hold out until 38 weeks, I can still have a home birth. I know for many of you, you probably don’t understand how devastating the idea of a hospital birth is to me, but it really is. Not only because I just don’t feel comfortable in them, but also because I’ve been preparing so hard for a home birth for nine months now, and it’s how I’ve always wanted it to be. Also, I am acutely aware of the fact that if I have to be induced, Pitocin creates “super contractions”…which are way worse than natural labor contractions…and I still don’t want an epidural…so I would get to experience A LOT of pain. Sigh.
The good news is that Baby Boy is fully developed, and even if he had to be born next week, he’d be fine…just skinny. So, at the least I know that he’s fine and healthy and it won’t likely be a huge issue in terms of his, or my health. Also good is that Brenda has been so outstanding in watching me like a hawk, that we are catching this so super early. I am very thankful for her thoroughness. On another note, even if we can keep the little guy inside until 38 weeks, Brenda will then begin doing anything we can (naturally) to get this kid delivered ASAP. So, likely, unless this all turns out to be some really bad false alarm or the kid is stubborn like his mother, we will have a baby before July 15th! And, frankly, with as uncomfortable as I’ve been lately (he’s starting to “drop”), that’s not such a bad thing.
So, I had a good cry on my way home from my appointment and I have to choke back tears when I think of the disappointment of possibly forgoing a home birth…and sheer frustration at my body’s inability to be NORMAL and do what it’s supposed to do. Ticks me off.
Oh yea, I’m on a very modified bed rest schedule…and Dr. S will likely be writing me off work sooner than I had planned so that I can accomodate it. Nothing too dramatic (thank God), because in my case being too stationary would actually make things worse…but I have to lie down for 30-60 minutes on my left side three-four times a day. Can’t exactly do that at work, you know? Spent the day doing baby laundry in the case that I end up being induced this week…although I think that’s probably not going to be the case…but maybe that’s just wishful thinking…
Anyway, pray that everything works out okay and that if it’s okay with God, I’d really still like a home birth…
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Ah, NORMAL, good luck working towards that.. then again, if you get there, I guess we can’t be friends :) I’m so sorry. I can hear the disappointment in your voice.. and parenting can be one long string of “change of plans.” SO HARD! I’ve been praying for you. Keep on keepin’ on. The nice thing is that there IS an end to your trial.. (I already did research to confirm that one can not stay pregnant indefinitely when I was pregnant myself :)
I am so glad your midwife is on top of things! Sounds like one way or another you are going to have a kiddo soon. Thinking of you! Keep your blog updated, we’ll be checking often! xoxo
Hey, maybe you’ll beat me to it and have your son before I have mine!! Good luck with your doctor visits. I’m sure they’re going to make sure you get the best of treatments. :-)
I know how heart broken you’ll be to not have a home birth. It’s a huge bummer, but one way or another you’ll have the cutest kid! Besides, think how educated you are now about home births! I promise not to judge you whether he’s born at home, in a hospital, in a car, with or without pain meds etc. You know you’ve done all you can for the little guy.. God will see you through! Love much, in our prayers.
there’s no such thing as a normal pregnancy. that being said, i really hope yours ends as normally as possible! we’ll pray for you. you are obviously in very good hands. precautions may seem frustrating, but they are for the best, and baby will be here before you know it!
yeah, i had pitocin with zeb, and it’s not fun. but it does get the baby out, and because of my high blood pressure that’s exactly what needed to happen. somethings can’t be helped.
How you doing? Thinking about you. xoxo
Hey, thanks for the update. I will definitely continue to lift you, Andy and that little one of yours before the Lord.
I want to echo what Becky said, there will be no judging from me. Inspite of all the best laid plans you pretty much have to go with whatever your body decides to do, whether that is normal or abnormal. *pout* With that said, I do hope you get to delivery this boy in your very own comfortable bed. Love you!
Thinking of and praying for you guys. Pregnancy can be stressful, especially when something is less than ideal. God loves that little boy and of course you and Andy too.
No matter where you end up having to deliver, God will be there.
Even if it’s Marion?
:)