As a mom to a child with a visible disability, I navigate the waters of wandering the grocery store aisle with stares, hushing questions, and that awkward “don’t stare…don’t stare…see? I’m not staring…” on a daily basis. As with most parents of special needs children, we are very aware of the red flush of cheeks when your four year old loudly asks “MOMMY! WHY DOES THAT LITTLE GIRL HAVE THAT THING?”
We get it.
Truly.
It happens to the best of us.
And as a mom to three other typically developing children, I still have to work with my children to understand and be kind to kids with needs different from even their sister’s. Trust me when I say that I have to instill the same lessons you do, even if we do have a sister with a metal walker, a myriad of therapy appointments, and a gaggle of specialists under our very roof. For her siblings, her pink leg braces, compression vest, and behavioral therapist are normal, but you pass by a child in a wheelchair in the bread aisle, and it’s so completely different, they don’t make the same connections. So much of parenting is a deliberate process, and this is no different.
I’ve compiled a list of Do’s & Dont’s for how to broach the sensitive subject of special needs with your child:
Check out the rest of the article on What To Expect…
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Oh my cuteness! They look like little dolls and I love how they are holding hands! Did you order Lucy’s headband from an Etsy shop? I have a curly-q myself and I am always on the hunt for headbands that are larger than toddler, but not quite big kid size.
I honestly can’t remember where I got them…but I want to say the dollar bins at Target? They are just stretchy sequin bands.
This is great advice on how to manage situations in which your child might feel awkward or not know what to say. Many children are impulsive by nature, as discussed in this article: http://www.psy-ed.com/wpblog/child-develop-self-control/ and may just blurt out the first thing that comes to mind – whether it is kind or not. Part of your job as a part is to help your child develop the self-control necessary to recognize what is appropriate to say, and how the other person will fee in reaction to what is said. Most importantly, treating the child with special needs like any other child is key. In the end, children will be comfortable if they can see how they are similar, even though they are different.
Awesome article. I’m 65 and I learned from reading it. I’ll use it for grandchildren and myself. Thank you. I love your blog and your words!