Disclaimer: this post will have some blood and (more importantly) some downright hideous pictures of me. So, FYI. You can click off now.
As I was going through the picture files (messily strewn between our desktop and laptops) looking for pictures of the girls for their 1-year birthday post, I came across the photos from my c-section.
Yup, that’s right.
C-section pics.
And I thought: those are kinda cool. And a good blog post I reckon.
In a MILLION years, I never thought I would post these pics.
But, a year out, I realize that my reason was vanity.
And a year out, I just don’t care anymore that I looked like a swollen wildebeest.
Don’t be impressed with my self-confidence.
The reality is that I don’t care because…well…I know that I don’t look like that anymore, so whatever.
Right?
So, you if weren’t around for the constant blog updates in real time during labor, I labored for…oh…over 28 hours.
Finally, after trying ev.er.y.thing.
everything
to avoid it, I ended up with a c-section.
Look, obviously my girls’ health is the most important thing ever. And I know that I had a harder time than most because of a silly little incision infection…but my blood just boils when I hear girls/women say “ew, I don’t want to do all that work! I’d rather just have a c-section!”
Oh. my.
Major surgery anyone?
Major surgery recovery AND taking care of a newborn (or two)?
Brilliant idea.
Let’s sign up for that.
Good grief.
…
So, a little over a year ago I was rolled into the operating room and sliced open like a watermelon.
Baby A. Otherwise known as Lucy.
See her weird cone head? Yeah, she hung out down low ready to go for a while.
But mama’s body wasn’t cooperating and wouldn’t dilate. So sad.
Lu was all dressed up and ready to go.
Note that gelatanous mound of weird?
Yeah, that would be my stomach.
Yumm-o.
Ironically, Lu was a bit gray and was a huge part of the reason I had a c-section.
Her little rate rate kept acting up and SHE created a fuss…not Jilly who is now the crown wearing trouble maker. :)
Baby B. One minute later. Otherwise known as Jilly.
I love how they just kinda used my stomach as a table.
Huge, chubby, pink and screaming. She did not like being disturbed. Not one little bit.
Notice the lack of stomach?
Apparently removing 13 pounds of baby and two amniotic sacs will do that to a girl.
Oh was Jill ANGRY.
She just hollered like it was no one’s business.
And Lu? Quiet as a bug. I don’t remember much from the experience, but I do remember a panic…
“Why isn’t she crying? Is something wrong? Is Lucy okay? Why isn’t she crying???”
They kept assuring me she was perfectly fine. She was just chillin out.
All the while Jill was acting as if she was being downright tortured.
My how things have changed!
And me?
I was drugged out of my cotton-pickin’ mind.
(My epidural didn’t work. So I had a spinal.)
I remember slurring words.
Asking them to bring me my babies….but only because that was what was supposed to happen…because honestly, in that moment, I just wanted to sleep. I felt like I was SUPPOSED to see them…I was SUPPOSED to care. But it was a downright act of epic proportions to just keep my eyes open.
They only brought me one baby.
And I have no idea which one it was.
And I don’t remember caring that I hadn’t seen the other.
I had done my duty.
Check.
Now on to passing out into a drug induced sleep.
They wheeled me into a recovery room.
Where I drifted in and out of consciousness.
Every time I woke up, I groggily asked for my babies.
Even though I knew full well that I had no business holding them.
I would just drop them.
For reals.
Only to fall back asleep seconds later.
Finally they wheeled me out and I was able to meet my girls for the first time.
THREE HOURS LATER.
I honestly thought it had been 15-20 minutes.
Them some good drugs.
Can I have some for now???
And good grief…
Do you love how awful I look?
You wanna know something hysterical?
Before I left for the hospital, I straightened my hair and applied make up.
Knowing I’d be in 1,000 photos.
A friend of mine looks fabulous in all her after-labor photos.
I looked like a Macy’s Day Parade balloon gone wrong in my post-Henry pics.
I wanted to change that this time around.
I didn’t take into consideration that those photos wouldn’t happen until 28 hours of labor later…
…agonizing, hurt worse than the first time, crazy pitocin filled, epidurals don’t work, dripping sweat from the pain, labor.
Or that I would swell up like the Michelin Man AFTER birth.
Weird.
And so, after all of that, I was left with this.
I can hardly recognize these little creatures.
Jill is no longer a chunk.
And Lucy is not a long lanky thing.
Funny how that goes.
In other news:
Have you read Rachel’s story?
Have you given towards the gift of mobility???
Crickets?
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Hard to believe it has been a year! I actually found your blog through twinstuff and was one of those stalkers hitting refresh for the live update version of their birth. I was especially interested because I was 7 months pregnant with twin girls at the time. I remember being scared to death of my pending csection because of your experience. I have to say that mine was much different. I was sore for a few days, but much preferred it to the vaginal birth I had with my son. I’m so sorry you had some worse case scenerio stuff. Too funny about straightening your hair, though I’ll admit to stopping for an eyebrow wax on my way to the hospital.
LOVE this!!! Soooo sweet! Childbirth is such a miracle.
My labors are, thankfully, fast. I think some of it must be hereditary b/c my mom and my grandma had short labors too. But trust me, as more time passes in the hospital I look worse and worse, because I can never sleep. Then I look swollen and puffy for days (weeks? months?) on end!
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You crack me up. 13 more days and I will have a very similar post – but only featuring ONE baby. Sometimes I dream of those good drugs again….
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I have to say I really do agree with the moms that rather go through a c-section than labour. I haven’t had a c-section, just my abdominal hysterectomy and I could not for the life of me understand the attraction. I didn’t have any infection either, just one majorly tender tummy for 4 weeks! I had 4 vaginal births and golly they were a breeze in comparison! My stand is: “so you blow a day working really hard WITH you body, what’s the big deal?” Sitting is a bit tender for a few days but at least you can drive (& not wait 6 weeks) hold the baby(s) on your lap and nowadays, go home the same day you had them. Try that with a c-section!
With my 4th I showered, did my hair, put makeup on and then laboured for another 6 hours! Still looked like I got dragged to the hospital behind a Mack truck! At least our babies were cute (ish) for the photos :o)
Congrats on making it through the first year and do enjoy them, no matter what they do as they grow. It’s fodder for family dinners with their friends :o)
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