Kristine blogs over at Cora’s Story.
A blog dedicated to helping spread awareness of congenital heart disease and urging parents to request pulse oximetry tests for their new babes.
Cora’s story impacted me deeply.
Little Cora died of pulmonary vein stenosis.
Henry had surgery to correct pulmonary valve stenosis when he was 23 months old.
I realize that’s not the same medically.
But as a mommy, my breath caught in my throat when I saw that it was only the difference of a few LETTERS.
Although Kristine mourns deeply, I love that she has a fire inside her to help others.
That she advocates every. single. day in the name of her beautiful little girl.
I love that her blog is a resource of information for others grieving.
I love that she is encouraging others.
{If you are new here, this post is part of a series from guests all over the blogosphere sharing their story of hope after infant loss/miscarrriage. Please forward this series on to someone you know who might need the encouragement of knowing she’s not alone.}
* * * *
Saturday morning errands. A quick trip to Trader Joe’s. A swing in to DSW. A stop at Walgreen’s for a pregnancy test.
My husband and I were staying at a hotel after going to a friend’s daughter’s first birthday party. It was Easter morning. For a few days, I’d felt extra tired and tenderness in my breast. I decided it warranted a pregnancy test. I didn’t expect to be pregnant. We were not trying to conceive, and I’d battled menstrual irregularity for years. I thought getting pregnant would be hard. I went through the drill as I had several times before and a few times since. Only this time, the second pink line appeared immediately. I woke up my husband with points to the restroom, and a firm, “Just look.”
In that moment my life changed completely. I changed completely. I was a mother.
Fast forward through an uneventful pregnancy. Late night on November 29, 2011, I showered and walked over to the kitchen counter to flip through some coupons. Couponing was my form of nesting. My water broke. A quick call to my husband, who’d left for a moment, and to the doctor on call, and we were on the way to the hospital.
I gave birth nearly 24 hours later. Cora was here.
She was so beautiful. She made me feel so beautiful. So full of love. The entire world looked so different. Little did I know five days later, the world would again change completely.
The doctors said she was healthy. She looked healthy and acted healthy. I loved spending time with her. During the day, I held her and listened to music play softly. I didn’t think my heart could a drop more of love. It was just full. Bursting with love.
On day five, her little heart burst. Maybe she was just too full of love and compassion too. I was nursing her when she suddenly died.
I was still a mother though. From the days of her funeral, I was determined to only grow that love, not to smoother it. I knew the best way to do so was to share her love and light. I asked for donations to a charity that helped us during our pregnancy for her funeral, even though we were quite financially unstable. We donated most of her belongings. Over the next few months, people started joining me and “Wear Pink for Cora,” was born. Each month on the 30th, people do good in her name, and wear pink. Her love hasn’t left. My love has multiplied over and over.
I also work to spread the word about congenital heart defects because I’d never heard the phrase. I learned they are relatively common, affecting 1 in 100 babies. I hope that because of Cora, no other mother will find out about her baby’s broken heart from the coroner.
* * * *
In conjunction with the stories of other women, this series hopes to provide a tangible form of support also.
Have you ever thrown your son a birthday party and kicked yourself afterwards wishing you had taken more pictures to record the day?
Imagine that feeling times one million.
Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep Foundation provides professional photography of sweet babies who will not be brought home to their freshly decorated nurseries.
Providing artfully and incredibly beautiful portraiture of their gorgeous babies is free to parents, but not free to run.
Please consider chipping in.
If each of us gave even $1, we would present NILMDTS with a check large enough to buy a new car.
Did you know that?
So please, consider jumping in with us this beautiful Monday morning.
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This is so beautiful. All the posts in this series have managed to make me cry! Thanks for sharing these stories.
Meg´s last blog post ..Doing Good in 140
Thank you for sharing Cora’s story. This series is so beautiful sad. Grieving mothers are such a powerful force, thank you for showing that good is capable from bad.
Kristine´s last blog post ..Send Love for Mothers Day Please Read and Pass On
I wish I had found this site a year ago when I was grieving my pregnancy loss. I had no idea there were so many out there. It’s never talked about.