Insomnia hates blogging.


If you follow my Facebook page, you know that I’ve been talking a bit about insomnia.

Namely, the fact that it’s something I’ve struggled with for as long as I can remember.

Times of stress and excitement bring it out in me.  (Also pregnancy.  And no.  Not it.)

I remember the night before the first day of school being the worst.  I looooooved school, and looked forward to a new year.  And I can remember the feeling of not being able to sleep…staring at the clock…and starting to panic…”I have to get up in 6 hours….5 hours…4 hours…” and by the time it got to about 3 hours before I knew my grandma was going to wake me up, it would blossom into a panic attack, complete with tears and feeling like I couldn’t breathe.

And I was SEVEN.

This theme has continued throughout my life.  But it’s never been terribly bad.  A few nights here.  A few nights there.  Long, frustrating, exhausting nights, but overall, it didn’t last long.  I can do a handful of sleepless nights.

And then the last…oh, say SIX MONTHS…I’ve been laying awake more than I’ve been sleeping.  Some nights I was so desperate for shut eye, I would take half a Unisom, which would knock me out, but would leave me a zombie for much of the next day.  Plus, I get nervous taking pills that potent on the regular.  Plus, I have four kids who kinda need me to help keep them alive and such.

At first, I wasn’t surprised. I chalked it up to buying a house, packing a house, selling a house, AND THE MILLIONS OF PHONE CALLS it takes to change school districts, new IEPs, and a to do list a mile long.  Moving is a pain.  Moving with a family of 6 and a kid with special needs who has dozens of agencies is NO JOKE.  Not sleeping during a major life change like that is totally standard for me.  (Anyone want to make a million dollars?  Start a business where you take care of all the phone calls and address changes and insurance move-overs for people.  I’d pay for that service.  Handsomely.  Except WE ARE NEVER EVER EVER moving again.  Ever.)

But it’s kept dragging on.  And it’s gotten worse, rather than better as we are settling in.  This week, I felt that all too familiar ache of exhaustion…Newborn Baby Exhaustion.  You know it.  When you are tired right down into the depths of your bones.  Everything hurts.

Needless to say, once I finally fell asleep, I wasn’t able to get up in the wee hours to get my blogging done.  And the Good Lord knows that I can’t pen a coherent thought with the Porkchop awake.  I can check email and throw up a short FB status, but I can’t WRITE.  (And then to add insult to injury, my blog was having technical difficulties this week.)

Lucky for me, you guys are the best ever and you all encouraged me on my FB page to try a variety of things.  One of which was melatonin.


So far, it works like a freaking charm.  I’m almost mad.

It doesn’t leave me groggy in the mornings and I’ve been falling asleep fairly easily.

So…all of that to say that I haven’t died or fallen off the face of the blogging planet.  Nor have I given up on blogging.  I just honestly could not function.

(P.S. if you’re ever wondering what’s going on around here, I’m usually updating over on FB.  So head over there if you aren’t already.)

Be on the lookout for more consistent posting around here.  In theory.

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I'm a mom to four. A wife to one. I believe in story. I love telling you about mine and would love to hear yours. There's really no sense in wasting our suffering and not sharing in each other's joy. We're all in this together...even if it doesn't always feel like it.

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  1. 1

    Haha.. you should call me or text me or find me on Facebook. For some weird reason, once I wake up in the middle of the morning, I can’t get back to sleep. And Dan comes home anywhere between 2-5am, then I can’t get back to sleep again, but he shuts down almost immediately. sheesh! Anyway, glad you finally found a solution, at least for now. But if it happens again, seek me out. Hugs

  2. 2

    I’m about to give unsolicitated advice… But have you had your thyroid checked? Sometimes this can be a factor in sleep issues. Hope it gets better soon!

  3. 3
    Andrea @ This Pug Life says:

    I deal with it too. The worst is being so physically exhausted you could cry, but still sleep will not come.

    I am back on Ambien, though I do not take it nightly because I know it can become habit forming and lose its effectiveness. I use it when I absolutely have to be up early the next morning. Luckily, I’ve never had any weird side effects from it, though sometimes I can fight my way through it and stay awake anyway.

  4. 4

    Try a small dose (.25 mg) of Xanax. It helps calm your mind and doesn’t leave any grogginess the next day. I am a firm believer that one night of bad sleep can lead to another…and then another. You become over tired and your mind starts to obsess over needing sleep. It’s a scary, frustrating cycle..

    That’s where the Xanax comes in. Take it at bedtime & you’ll likely sleep through the whole night. Some will disagree with me as I know everyone has different beliefs on RX drugs. But small doses are very reasonable and not habit forming.

    As an alternative, I would suggest acupuncture. I had great success with that a few years ago.

  5. 5 says:

    Melatonin is a gift from Jesus! No question. I am so glad you were able to get a little rest. I hope you are enjoying a wonderful weekend of rest with the gang.