Pinsanity

By now, most of you are irrevocably addicted to Pinterest…right?

(Oh please say yes!)

I love me some happy inspiration and Pinterest more than satisfies my I’m-bored-and-I-have-a-few-minutes-on-the-computer-to-surf-mindlessly itch.

BUT.

Sometimes, I want to scream at my computer.  Pull out my hair.  Or just die laughing at the craziness.

Now, if you’ve been on the internet at all, you know that it has somehow coaxed all of the weirdos from their foxholes and made them all feel normal.

So they share random things like hot pink wigs made out of crocheted yarn, or reusable (fabric) toilet paper, or weird cookie cutters shaped like fetus’.  There’s even an entire website dedicated to making fun of the crazy on Pinterest.  Appropriately named Pinterest You Are Drunk.  (You can find all of those examples listed there.)

But there’s something more head-scratching to me lurking innocently amid my more normal crafty pins…you see, I get that there are really…um, interesting people out there.  Some of them are just making their “art”, some are “expressing themselves”, and some are just really mad at their parents even though enough time has passed so they should probably just get over it by now.

What kills me on Pinterest are the things that on the surface seem fairly normal or fun or cool…but when you really stop to look at them, you think…SERIOUSLY PEOPLE?! YOU WANT TO TRY THAT?!

I mean, I’m all about getting my Crafty Pants on too…I’ve been known to throw a fairly detailed themed baby shower…and I make my own laundry detergent.  These things are all true.  BUT.  At some point, enough is enough folks!  Go ahead and be industrious.  Make stuff from scratch.  Upcycle or whatever the term is.  Handmade rocks.  I heart it.

But there is a limit.  It is real.  It exists.

Finally, I created a board called “I’d Rather Jump Off A Bridge Than Do This“.

Not for the really obvious stuff that is ultra bizzare, that’s just weird…but the stuff that gets pinned and re-pinned as if it is a good idea and something someone totally wants to try.

(I realize that some of you may disagree with my assessments here, but that’s okay.)

Here are some examples:

 

 

Now, this might seem like a clever idea on the surface. I mean, let’s save some money and reuse stuff, right?
Except that…I mean, really…at some point…you can buy a REAL watering can at the Walmarts for $1.88.
And there is no work involved. (I have a feeling that poking holes in that lid is harder than it looks…)
And you can recycle the plastic jug.
The end.

Source: bhg.com via Jeannett on Pinterest

 

Okay, so this one’s pretty, right?
Totally. I actually love it.
But can we get real for a minute here? Please?
You do realize that unless you have the STEADIEST of hands, and a pretty artsy self…this is going to be a complete and utter disaster, right?
The average person cannot just stop at Rite Aid for a white Sharpie and design on a vertical, non-flat, ultra shiny and smooth surface like this.
Because you know what happens when the average mama tries this?
She has to buy new turquoise lamps.
Because she threw this one against the wall after 15 minutes.

 

Let me get this straight: you are going to rinse out a sticky Gatorade bottle, hacksaw it apart, and then use it to close up a plastic bag?
I have two words for you: CHIP and CLIP.
Or just eat the rest of the chocolate chips with a jar of peanut butter like normal people.  (And please tell me what recipe you know of that only calls for half a bag?!)

 

No. Just no.
I don’t really need to get into this…but seriously…imagine your kids traipsing through the house on the way to the shower.
The end.

 

Now, I know that some of you love this.
It’s all cute and pastely and eastery.
Look, it’s already an egg.
That’s plenty of springy on its own.
Food coloring is gross. Try to refrain.  There’s plenty of other opportunities to get your pink and green on.

 

Okay, so I’m all about fun themed parties.
I’ve been known to re-wrap water bottles with coordinating scrapbook paper to make it all festive and such.
But there comes a time when perhaps the matchy matchyness should end.
And tying your hot dog buns together with twine and fabric is a good start.
Because you realize this means that you’re serving up cold hot dogs, right?
Cold pizza is one thing…but cold hot dogs are not okay. Even if they’re cute.

And twine is weird…I feel like I’d be picking little slivers of twine and bits of thread out of my ketchup…

 

This is another pin that sounds like a fabulous idea on the surface.
But do you know what will inevitably happen here?
You know how you cross your right leg over your left and when you have extra cute shoes on you can’t help but kinda bounce your foot up and down and sorta roll your ankle in circles…kinda like the foot “look at me!” equivalent to how newly engaged girls suddenly use their left hands an AWFUL lot?
Okay, so you’ll be doing this with your fun new shoes you reupholstered…and the fabric and glue is gonna start coming undone along the bottom…you know, where it bends and rubs against the CONCRETE ALL DAY…and instead of people checking out your fabulous new houndstooth pumps, they’re wondering why they are peeling like a snake shedding its skin.
And instead of looking all cool and hip, you’ll look like a cheap fool who didn’t just throw the old 1987 pumps away when the rest of us did.

Source: tipnut.com via Jeannett on Pinterest

 

There are just certain things that have no business with the letters DIY before them.
Waxing your most sensitive regions with a homemade concoction is one of them.
This is a bad sitcom episode waiting to happen.

 

This one got pinned and repinned like a BEAST.
It was everywhere.
Apparently Pinterest users have a problem with keeping their bathrooms springtime fresh.  And apparently they’ve never heard of a Glade Plug-In either.
But perhaps they forgot that LIQUID PERFUMED OIL can seep through thin cardboard tubes and right onto the actual toilet paper you use to wipe your most sensitive regions.
Combined with the DIY Sugaring above, this could make for quite the rash.
And the best laugh the docs at the ER will have all year.

“But I was just trying to be crafty and DIYesque!!!”

But do you see what I mean?
These are things that get repinned in all seriousness. They’re not meant to be quirky or artsy or just plain weird. And I watch them pop up in my feed like it’s all normal and something to be tried.
And it’s not.
Wear your Crafty Pants girls!  Recycle, Reuse, and Reduce!  Skip the big box store and be all handmade-y!  Yes!  Please!  I love it!

Just don’t be dumb about it.

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jeannett
I'm a mom to four. A wife to one. I believe in story. I love telling you about mine and would love to hear yours. There's really no sense in wasting our suffering and not sharing in each other's joy. We're all in this together...even if it doesn't always feel like it.
jeannett
jeannett

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Comments

  1. 1
    wendy holmes says:

    Love all your pins!! they make me laugh too! You missed the sew your own underwear one though! I feel like a lot of research has gone into underwear over the years and I just want to leave that craft project to the professionals. LOL

  2. 3

    pahahahahahahah i’m dying over here.
    kim @ oh, sweet joy´s last blog post ..((outfit schmoutfit))

  3. 4

    This was one of the funniest posts I’ve read in a while. I shared it on my blog FB page so many more could enjoy it.

    The hot dog on had me rolling, but the lamp one had me shaking my head. Honestly people. Honestly. Just. No.
    Diana @Hormonal Imbalances´s last blog post ..15 weeks pregnant with twins! {and a pic}

  4. 5

    Thanks for the laugh!!!

  5. 6

    Ha. I’ve wanted to say things like that on a lot of pins but feel bad that the original author would see it. Well said!

    • 7

      you know, I’m totally stressing about that right now…I don’t want to seem mean spirited…I guess I just hope that readers realize I’m being melodramatic for comedic effect and that this is just ME…it might be a fabulous idea, but it’s not MY gig…

      You know, I have a friend who when I told her I was making homemade bread, she just kind of shook her head and said “You know, they sell that pre-made at the store…” So, it’s all about perspective and personal preference. :)

  6. 8

    Haha…laughed when I saw the milk jug, because I had just pinned it. My thought-crabby 2 year old…new (free) toy that involves water = free entertainment. I completely get that giving him the watering can would be the same thing-except this is different and new. How I would have actually gotten the wholes in the milk jug—that I don’t know…so maybe you are right. :)
    Kelly´s last blog post ..39 Weeks

  7. 10
    Carrie R. says:

    I thought the same exact thing when I saw the lamp. I thought, how cute! But then I stopped to think about it and realized there was no way my hand could do that. I might as well have my 2 year old draw on the lamp.

    And the messy twister.

  8. 12

    This is one of the funniest blog posts I’ve ever read! Right up there with Julie Carson’s Freakcycle post which still makes me laugh out loud!
    I get irritated with Pinterest for this same reason. I have the absolute non-craftiest of friends who pin all sorts of outrageous things and every single time I think “Yeah right! You will never do that!” Your examples take the cake though! So awesome! And the board itself is a riot!
    I thought the same thing about the milk jug one because I know most people are probably thinking it’s a good idea for their kids. But what little kid can lift a 2-gallon jug of water to tip the water out?!? Come on, people!
    For the record, I would TOTALLY do the messy Twister thing with my kids. Outside. In the summer. When they can just be hosed off. :)
    Kelly´s last blog post ..Shape Up!

    • 13

      Julie’s Freakcycle post is pretty much my all time favorite post in all of the internets!

      And, you are a way cooler mom than I am. For the record.

  9. 14

    This is by far the funniest post I have read in quite some time. And yes, the toilet paper one, really? Thank you for the laugh!

  10. 15
    rachel h. says:

    I have to stand up for messy twister. I did this two different years when I was working parks and rec and the kids loved it. We had them wear trash bags like dresses and they hosed off when they were done. It would be perfect for a messy Birthday party with water play following it. I used ketchup, mustard, relish, and I have no idea what I used for blue, this was nearly 15 years ago. Maybe mayo with blue coloring… Anyway, I just had to share ’cause it really was a blast, but I am with you on the others. :-)

    • 16

      So, my pregnant belly is churning at the thought of rolling around in various condiments and I almost lost it completely when you said soemthing about blue mayo. :)

  11. 17

    Your “I’d rather jump off a bridge…” board is my favorite of yours. Some stuff on pinterest is just redonk.

  12. 18

    i love this because it is exactly what goes through my mind when i see these pins over and over again. absurd.
    melissa stover´s last blog post ..A weekend away

  13. 19

    oddly enough, it just made me want to browse pinterest though.
    melissa stover´s last blog post ..A weekend away

  14. 20
    Kathleen says:

    This post is pure awesome. Nothing more to say.

  15. 21

    i agree with you on all of these… except for the watering can. only because i was thinking, i hate wal mart and i rarely use a watering can. so why have one sit around for years only to use it once or twice (if that) when i could recycle my milk jug if i needed too, which i probably won’t need to :) i will have to check out your board :)
    Trish´s last blog post ..oops…

  16. 22

    and this post reminds me of why i am not a fan of pinterest. funny funny pins though. and the first comment about the underwear… fantastic!
    sandi´s last blog post ..snow skiing with mommy

  17. 23

    I like Pinterest for some stuff, but not for crafty DIY stuff. Mainly because I am neither crafty nor DIYish. I agree with all of your choices! You won’t see me doing any of these.
    Cynthia M´s last blog post ..Family Pets Hillbilly Style

  18. 24

    Brilliant this is just brilliant!

    Pinterst is blocked at my work so i hardly get a chance to spend time there — and think I agree with all your thoughts on these ideas!

    you are very funny my lady!

    xoTiffany

  19. 25

    So funny. SO, so, funny! Thanks for the giggle!

  20. 26

    Oh my goodness. I am still laughing! Thank you for showing me the error of my “thrifty” “DIY” ways. Ha ha! :)

  21. 27

    Thank you! I thought I was the only one that saw the complete ridiculousness of the chocolate chip storage solution. Who has left over chocolate chips? And what’s wrong with using a ziplock bag? That one was re-pinned like crazy. I actually haven’t come across any of the others, but they are equally ridiculous.
    Rita´s last blog post ..Recycled Gift Bows

  22. 28

    THANK YOU! A sane person on Pinterest!

    I look at most of it and suddenly feel very large and uncrafty. Oh, and my house is very uncordinated and my kids suffer from me not decorating enough for the holidays.

    But please – point me to where I can BUY a turquiose lamp already done like that? ha! :)
    Rachel´s last blog post ..Bikini Bingo Bust

  23. 29

    Yes, I am addicted to Pinterest… and now I might be addicted to your new board! Seriously? Seriously, people. The egg one got me- it is a combonation of pretty and gross all at the same time. And you are right on about those chocolate chips. Grab me a spoon and a jar of PB, momma- gatorade bottles don’t exist in this house!

    Jessie Lynn
    Bloom in the Details´s last blog post ..Instagram Friday

  24. 30

    You are hilarious.
    Lindsey´s last blog post ..Favorite Spring Things

  25. 31

    Too funny, and I’ll admit that I have a couple of these things pinned on my boards.
    Marci´s last blog post ..Shaving Cream Play

  26. 32

    you crack me up. and i agree!

  27. 33

    Oh.my.word. This had me cracking up. You are SO so so so right. These are RIDICULOUS!!! In fact, it’s hard to decide which is worst!!!
    Brianna´s last blog post ..Lenten reflections 2012

  28. 34

    Oh and I meant to say–I love me some devilled eggs. But those you posted are NASTY. As in, I would NOT eat them. Not cute, or pretty, or even festive. Just gross! So maybe that is the worst one!
    Brianna´s last blog post ..Lenten reflections 2012

  29. 35

    i know, i get it, the melodrama and humor… but yet, i can’t get over how this feels pretty much like a case of “don’t say anything if you don’t have anything nice to say”. so you wouldn’t do these things everyone seems to pin and repin, so what? a few laughs? sure, but at someone else’s expense? no so much.

    just wanted to put this out there since it didn’t quite sit right with me. i know you’re intensions were never to be mean, but if one of my crafts were up there i would be hurt. {p.s. a bit conflicted about posting this since it goes against the grain of the rest of the comments.}
    megan´s last blog post ..pink sky night

    • 36

      I don’t think you should ever feel conflicted posting a comment that goes “against the grain” of what everyone else is saying. In fact, isn’t that kind of what I did in this post to begin with in a sense? Where everyone else was like “hey! this is great!”, I’m saying “Now wait a minute…” So I totally get it.
      And you’re right, it probably can be taken as mean and possibly hurt feelings of some…but I think that we all need to know how to laugh at ourselves, and I’d like to think that even if you think Messy Twister is a fantastic idea (and there was more than one person who did!), you can appreciate why *I* would think it’s insane. And individually these things aren’t really that crazy, but I think when you put them all together it can show how we might be DIYing ourselves into oblivion…which is kind of a whole other issue I see going on in blogland…
      So please, continue to voice your opinion, I appreciate your comment and I totally get it. I really do. I guess I would just rather err on the side of being light hearted and knowing that if it were one of my pins on someone else’s blog, I’d just laugh too. :)

  30. 37

    Love this post! I am going to start a board of ridiculousness too. Although I have to admit I pinned the eggs – I think I was just trying to get more Easter pins (that, and food coloring doesn’t gross me out). I thought the same thing when I saw the chocolate chips – ever heard of an old twistie tie off your bread or a rubber band?
    Cindy´s last blog post ..Tricycle

  31. 38

    That toilet paper one… I saw that and I was like there are SO many other things in my bathroom that I would put essential oil on before turning to a freakin toilet roll. And I am 100% with you on the food-colored eggs. I prefer my food to come in its intended colors. Not only that, but my first thought on seeing the hot dog pin? “Wouldn’t they get cold?” Yes, yes they would. Thanks for making me laugh!
    Anne-Marie @ Do Not Faint´s last blog post ..Sanity Sundays: Ginger Green Tea

  32. 39

    this post cracks me up and i have to say that i’ve had the same reaction to nearly all those pins! EXCEPT that i do the oil thing on the tp tube. i have a diffuser in the bathroom and just rub the reeds on the inside. it never leaks into the paper. been doing it for several years and it does make a difference – when you pull the tp. now … i don’t have an outlet in my bathroom. yeah, i know, who designs a bathroom without an outlet?! so i got creative when we moved in!
    christi @ burlap and basil´s last blog post ..snickerdoodle bread

  33. 40

    bahahahaha!
    thanks for the serious belly laugh!

    CHIP AND CLIP!!? :))))
    and…i would SO be the momma buying new lamps after throwing mine against the wall.
    i’d have a rash, too!

    ps confession: i pinned the hot dogs. eeek!

  34. 41

    Pinterest rejects me.

    After reading your post, I’m ok with the rejection.

    ;0)
    Caryl

  35. 42

    I’m so glad I’m not the only one who can’t stomach those dyed deviled eggs.

    I do love the watering jug idea though. I’d reuse every single piece of garbage in my recycling bin if it means I don’t have to go to walmart. ;)

  36. 43

    LOL. You crack me up. I love that you created a board for such nonsense. I have a “weird and creepy” board but yours is a much better idea.

  37. 44

    I loved everything about this post. Thank you!
    I, too, had a little freakout on Pinterest this week: http://www.theboltons.com/2012/04/monday-night-mini-rant.html

  38. 45

    I loved this post so much I included it in Lots of Link Love for this week!

    http://www.stresscasey.blogspot.com/2012/04/lots-of-link-love.html
    Casey´s last blog post ..Lots of Link Love

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