For months now, I’ve felt this way.
This intense desire to sit every single pre-teen, teen, early 20’s…heck, just about EVERY girl in America (okay, maybe the world even) down and have a chat with them.
A real, true, down to the core, heart to heart.
I want to sit them down on the couch, kneel in front of them, grab their shoulders firmly and give them that little squeeze that says “listen close. this is important. don’t miss it“. I want to look them straight in the eyes and make sure I have their full, undivided attention.
I want them to sense my urgency.
My love for them.
Are you listening? Put your phone away. That text can wait. This cannot.
And then I will loosen my grip on their shoulders and I will show them this:
(source)
Isn’t she stunning?
That hair! Thick and full and shiny. That incredible shampoo commercial hair…every. single. day.
See her eyelashes? Long and amazing. Rimming gorgeous doe eyes with makeup done just right.
And that body! Can you believe it? Just beautiful.
Perfect skin. Flawless complexion. Every square inch of her aglow.
Did I mention she’s famous? And really really really rich on top of it all.
Frankly, by just about all accounts, she’s perfect.
She’s been blessed with some of the world’s most incredible genes, she’s rich, she’s famous, and she has the resources and team of people to take her fabulous to even more fabulous heights.
It’s almost overwhelming.
But I want you to know something else too.
This woman, arguably one of the most gorgeous women on the planet, in the top tier of riches, with the fancy cars and the designer wardrobe and enough shoes to outfit a small country…
Doesn’t have it all.
Did you know she’s been divorced twice and she’s only 31? Now, I want you to hear me: I’m not bashing her for being divorced. I’m not judging her. Honestly. I don’t know her personally, and I don’t know the reasons why things didn’t work out. Relationships are complicated. Frankly, it doesn’t matter why. I don’t care what the rumors are. That’s not my point. My point is this:
I’m pretty sure that this gorgeous woman has cried herself to sleep. More than once.
I know, just because I’m a woman too, that she’s doubted herself.
Wished things could be different.
Replayed events and second guessed her decisions. Not just in relationships, but other things too I would imagine.
Wondered what was wrong with her.
Did you hear that?
Yes, women like Kim Kardashian are plagued by that nagging voice in their heads…just like the rest of us.
The voice that says we aren’t good enough. The voice that says that we messed it all up. The ugly voice that whispers hideous lies to us.
Behind that perfect makeup and that air of confidence lies a girl…just like you and me…that isn’t quite so confident when the cameras are gone and it’s just her and her bedroom.
And that makes me sad.
Just like it makes me sad that you do it too. In your own room when you think everyone is asleep.
I know because I’ve done it too.
Heck, at 31, married with three kids, I even do it now. Except it’s not the head cheerleader’s life I covet anymore. It’s other, more subtle things.
We all do. Even the most popular girl in your school. The one with the perfect smile and hottest boyfriend.
Even Kim Kardashian. The girl who has all of the things we secretly wish for. All of the things we covet. The girl who looks and has all those things we don’t.
Even SHE wonders why it isn’t perfect.
And here’s what I want you to hear, this is where you must listen very closely:
Stop believing that if you were just 15 pounds lighter, that boy would like you.
Stop wishing that you were just 3 inches taller.
Stop starving yourself.
Stop disrespecting your body because you think love waits around the bend.
Stop pretending you are dumb because you think it’s cute.
Stop wishing you could be like someone else.
STOP BELIEVING THAT YOU AREN’T GOOD ENOUGH.
Stop believing that if only…just this one thing about you was different…if only things were just a little bit better…your figure was just a little bit firmer, a little bit curvier, a little bit prettier, you were a little bit smarter, had nicer clothes…that everything else would fall into place.
Stop believing that if only you weren’t really YOU…things would be so much better.
Because I want you to see that it isn’t true.
I want you to see that even women who have all those things we secretly wish for…all those silly, materialistic, outward things that don’t feel silly to you right now…they don’t make it all better. They don’t solve everything. They don’t make your life perfect.
You can have it all, and still not have it all.
I want you to have a beautiful heart.
I want you to love others.
I want you to hold your head high even if the hair atop it isn’t shiny and thick.
I want you to shape and mold and nurture your strengths. The things that make you uniquely YOU.
Because life will never be perfect.
Things will probably never look exactly like you pictured way back when you were a little girl.
I can promise you that.
And I can promise you that things aren’t always as perfect as they seem on the outside for others.
No one really has it all together.
Even the prettiest, most popular girl at your school.
Not even Kim Kardashian.
Source: emilymcdowell.posterous.com via Jeannett on Pinterest
So be YOU.
Stop wishing you were a different version of you.
It wouldn’t matter in the long run.
Because you are beautiful and lovely and perfect in your own way.
Pinky promise.
{I want to be really open here and let you know that I don’t want to see comments bashing, condemming, or in any other way doing that celebrity gossip thing here. Anything derogatory or mean spirited will be deleted. On the flip side, I hope you see my heart and don’t feel the need to come rushing to Kim Kardashian’s defense and decry my post. My intention is not to cast stones or judge or any other such thing…because this isn’t really about Kim…and if you think it is, you missed the whole point.}
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Just what every girl, even girls in their mid-40s needs to hear. Well done :)
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Thank you. Much needed today.
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I am going to email this to my 13 year old daughter and I re-read it myself twice:)
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I am so glad I ran across this post tonight, thank you for this!
This actually made me cry. I love you, and I love this post, you are a brilliant, beautiful person, with a beautiful heart to match! Bless ya, girl!
I love this…I always wish I could be that skinny super model but Im not… let me tell ya I’m one thick girl thats bootylicious with jiggly stuff everywhere but you are absolutely correct no one is perfect…personality and the good in people make a person beautiful not just looks…you got down on this clip I loved it!!! God Bless you!!
This was perfect, exactly what I needed to read today.
I just re-read this today, and it brought me to tears. Thank you. Thank you for telling us what Jesus wants to remind us of every day.
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For God’s sake, just don’t wish you were Kim Kardashian!! Do you know WHY she got famous….a sex tape. She videotaped herself having sex. Porn stars do that. If KK had ANY respect for herself, she wouldn’t have a full face of paint, a closet full of slutty shoes and be carrying a child whose father won’t marry her.
This is no one to envy or emulate.
I do agree with everything on your post except I wish you had used Kate Middleton. Her life seems perfect, she married a prince, but we know it isn’t. As for Kim Kardashian, I feel pity, not envy. Everything from her hair, nails and eyelashes is fake, inside is worse. If someone envies Kim I think they need their priorities examined and I don’t mean you.